Did I read that sign right?
In the Restroom: TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW In a Laundromat: AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT In a Memphis department store: BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS In an office: WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL [...]
The Blonde in Mourning
A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss asked sympathetically, “What’s the matter?” The blonde replies, “Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away.” The boss, feeling sorry for her, says, “Why don’t you go home for the day? Take the day off [...]
My Twitter Won’t Tweet!
Things are spiraling out of control. I think I have become lost in a world of electronic madness. One of my sons informed me this week that my cell phone has become obsolete and I must head down to the Cell Phone store and get a phone that is contemporary with the times. I pointed [...]
The Mechanic and the Surgeon
A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop. The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike. The mechanic shouted across the garage, “Hey, Doc, can I ask you a [...]
Jack Daniels Fishing Story
I finally got around to going fishing this mornin but after a while I ran out of worms. Then I saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth, and frogs are good bass bait. Knowing the snake couldn’t bite me with the frog in his mouth, I grabbed him right behind the head, took [...]
Winter In West Virginia
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Global Warming?
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The Philosopher’s Bible.
Explore My Views On Politics, Science, God, Whether The Toilet Seat Should Be Up Or Down, The Environment And Loads Of Other Stuff That Has Fallen Out Of My Mind And Onto The Page. It’s Funny, Controversial And Revolutionary, Even If I Do Say So Myself. Experience the joy and frustration of exploring Alias Pseudonym’s [...]
HIGH SCHOOL –1959 vs. 2009
Scenario 1: Jack goes quail hunting before school and then pulls into the school parking lot with his shotgun in his truck’s gun rack. 1959 – Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack’s shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack… 2009 – School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack [...]
Guaranteed Pension
Every elderly person is Guaranteed an accumulate wealth! Silver in the Hair Gold in the Teeth Stones in the Kidneys Sugar in the Blood Lead in the Feet Iron in the Arteries And an in exhaustible supply of Natural Gas! Bet you never thought being elderly would accumulate such wealth, It is your Guaranteed [...]
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