Stimulus money

Stimulus money

Lessons Learned from the Stimulus bill: Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment? A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers. Q. Where will the government get this money? A. From taxpayers. Q. So the government is giving me back my own money? A....

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Fixing the American Economy

Fixing the American Economy

When people talk about fixing the American Economy it is not simple.  The economy has been broken for years and will not be fixed over night.  Now the liberals will tell you we will take from the top 1% and have them pay for the rest.  But, what and who does that...

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How the Moral Changes

How the Moral Changes

OLD VERSION The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The...

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Senior Moments

Senior Moments

This is just a nice collection of Senior Moment Jokes Garage Door The boss walked into the office one morning not knowing his zipper was down and his fly area wide open.. His assistant walked up to him and said, 'This morning when you left your house, did you close...

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THE MAILMAN’S LAST DAY

THE MAILMAN’S LAST DAY

          It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.         When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family, who congratulated him and sent him...

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Psych 101 and Politics

Psych 101 and Politics

  If    you start with a cage containing five (5) monkeys and  inside the cage, hang a  banana on a string from the top  and then you place a set of stairs under the banana, before long a monkey will go to the stairs and climb toward the banana. As soon as he touches...

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Preacher’s Son

Preacher’s Son

 An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession.  Like many young men his age, the boy didn't really know what he wanted to do, and he didn't seem too concerned about it.  One day, while the...

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Out of Office e-mail Replies

Out of Office e-mail Replies

Pick one for the next time you are out of the office. 1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood. 2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in,...

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Random Thoughts for the Day

Random Thoughts for the Day

  Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.          I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.          There is great need for a sarcasm font.          How the hell are you supposed to...

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HIGH SCHOOL –1959 vs. 2009

HIGH SCHOOL –1959 vs. 2009

Scenario 1: Jack goes quail hunting before school and then pulls into the school parking lot with his shotgun in his truck's gun rack. 1959 - Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack... 2009 - School goes...

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Economic Repercussions

Economic Repercussions

The Economy Is So Bad...   CEO's are now playing miniature golf.   Jewish women are marrying for love.   Even people who have nothing to do with the Obama administration aren't paying their taxes.   Hotwheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM.   Obama met...

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The Blonde Bus Ride

The Blonde Bus Ride

Two bowling teams, one of all Blondes and one of all Brunettes, charter a double-Decker bus for a weekend trip to Louisiana. The Brunette team rode on the bottom of the bus, and the Blonde team rode on the top level. The Brunette team down below really whooped it up,...

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Great truths about growing old

Great truths about growing old

 1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional...  2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.  3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.  4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a...

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How to Send a Letter to a Congressman

How to Send a Letter to a Congressman

Writing your congressman is an important right you have as a citizen of the United States. If you have an issue or petition you would like to bring up to him, sending a letter is a great way to do that. It is important to recognize that your congressman gets tons of...

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Catholic Horses

Catholic Horses

  One day while he was at the track playing the ponies and all but   losing his shirt, Al noticed a priest who stepped out onto the track   and blessed the forehead of one of the horses lining up for the 4th       Race.    Lo and behold, that horse - a very long shot...

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The Priest And The Hairdryer

The Priest And The Hairdryer

A distinguished young woman on a flight from Switzerland asked the priest beside her, "Father, may I ask a favor?" The priest replied: "Of course, what may I do for you?"  "Well, I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my mother's birthday that is...

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The Blonde in Mourning

The Blonde in Mourning

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss asked sympathetically, "What's the matter?" The blonde replies, "Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away." The boss, feeling sorry for her, says, "Why don't you go...

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Did I read that sign right?

Did I read that sign right?

In the Restroom: TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW In a Laundromat: AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT In a Memphis department store: BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS In an office: WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP...

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