Government Dead Horse Strategies

The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from generation to generation, says that, “When you discover that you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount.”

 

However, in government, in corporate America, more advanced strategies are often employed, such as:

 

1. Buying a stronger whip.

 

2. Changing riders.

 

3. Appointing a committee to study the horse.

 

4. Arranging to visit other countries to see how other cultures ride horses.

 

5. Lowering the standards so that dead horses can be more productive.

 

6. Reclassifying the dead horse as “living-impaired.”

 

7. Hiring outside contractors to lift the dead horse and move its legs.

 

8. Harnessing several dead horses together to increase speed.

 

9. Providing additional funding and/or training to increase the dead horse’s performance.

 

10. Doing a productivity study to see if lighter riders would improve the dead horse’s performance.

 

11. Declaring that as the dead horse does not have to be fed, it is less costly, carries lower overhead, and therefore, contributes substantially more to the bottom line of the economy than do some other horses.

 

12. Rewriting the expected performance requirements for all horses.

 

And of course…

 

13. Promoting the dead horse to a supervisory position…

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