Not Politically Correct Political Jokes for Fun

If con is the opposite of pro, then is Congress the opposite of progress? Q: How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb? A: Two: one to change it and another one to change it back again. Q: What do you call a lawyer who has gone bad? A: Senator. The NSA:...

I need a Bailout!

If your frustrated with the Bailouts Politics we are all seeing, well try this video song because I think it will at least make you smile a bit!   I know the song made me grin after seeing that the goverment is spending over 23 Trillion on the bailout which is more...

Explain Life

On the first day, God created the dog and said: ‘Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.’ The dog said: ‘That’s a long time to be barking. How...

My Twitter Won’t Tweet!

Things are spiraling out of control. I think I have become lost in a world of electronic madness. One of my sons informed me this week that my cell phone has become obsolete and I must head down to the Cell Phone store and get a phone that is contemporary with the...

A Well-Planned Retirement

Outside England ‘s Bristol Zoo there is a parking lot  for 150 cars and 8 buses. For 25 years, its  parking fees were managed by a very pleasant  attendant. The fees were £1 for cars ($1.40),  £5 for busses (about $7).  Then, one day, after 25 solid years of...

Did you Survive the Past?

The past would be 1930’s, 40’s, 50’s, 60’s and 70’s!! First, we survived being born to mothers,  Who smoked and/or drank while they were Pregnant. We took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, Tuna from a can and didn’t get tested for...

Sunday Golf

Father Norton woke up Sunday morning and realizing it was an exceptionally beautiful and sunny early spring day, decided he just had to play golf. So…  He told the Associate Pastor that he was feeling sick and persuaded him to say Mass for him that day. As soon...

Only when you’re in the Navy

This is a little known tidbit of naval history! The U. S. S. Constitution (Old Ironsides), as a combat vessel, carried 48,600 gallons of fresh water for her crew of 475 officers and men. This was sufficient to last six months of sustained operations at sea. She...

Guaranteed Pension

Every elderly person is Guaranteed an accumulate wealth! Silver in the Hair Gold in the Teeth Stones in the Kidneys Sugar in the Blood Lead in the Feet Iron in the Arteries And an in exhaustible supply of Natural Gas! Bet you never thought being elderly would...

great truths that little children have learned

 1) No matter how hard you try, you can’t baptize cats.. 2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don’t let her brush your hair. 3) If your sister hits you, don’t hit her back. They always catch the second person. 4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to...